Write a post in which you:
- Analyze what you learned from the Voices of Diversity video regarding perspectives and experiences of gender and sexuality. What idea, experience, or statement resonated with you the most, and why?
- Then, describe your approach to the Privilege for Sale activity and any challenges you encountered in selecting privileges. Describe at least one insight you gained from the activity.
- Apply your learning to social work practice with the LGBTQ population and to allyship.
[MUSIC PLAYING] KATHY PURNELL: What’s going to happen today is we’re going to have a conversation, and with us, we have two amazing core faculty members who I’ll ask to introduce themselves as we focus on gender and sexuality. CHRIS COTTEN: My name is Dr. Chris Cotton. I am a core faculty member in Walden’s MSW program. I have been working for Walden since 2017. KIM KICK: Hello. I am Dr. Kim Kick. I am the MSW academic program coordinator in the MSW program, and also a core faculty member. I’ve been with Walden University nearly eight years now. KATHY PURNELL: My first question that I want to engage us in is this. The discomfort around gender and sexuality can often be difficult for some to discuss or even understand. Why is this? And why is this not as difficult for some? KIM KICK: There’s quite a few different variables that go into this, but I think one of them is religious beliefs. So people grow up with different religious beliefs, with different tolerance levels for talking about gender and sexuality amongst other things. So depending on the context in which the person comes from with religious beliefs– with their community, different communities have different thoughts and ideas about gender and sexuality. And when you think about this, when do we ever talk– I mean, at least when I was going to high school, middle school, grammar school, gender and sexuality was never spoken about. So I don’t think that we give people a context for having this conversation, and the context they get, that comes from, again, there’s communities, so it’s kind of a microcosm of this. And that, I think, is one of the main factors that makes this very difficult for some people, while others that come from perhaps a more open background are more able and easily engage in this type of conversation. KATHY PURNELL: Chris, what are your thoughts about that question around why is this topic– why can it be difficult for some to discuss and for others it’s not? CHRIS COTTEN: I think a couple of reasons. I would say to begin with, just a general taboo in our culture here in the United States about talking about sex and sexuality in general. I also think that members of– I guess diverse sexualities and gender identities, I think that they’re sort of sexualized by members who are not in those communities. So I think that many people from the dominant culture, when they think of say, gay, lesbian, bisexual, they’re thinking completely about sex. And I think that makes them uncomfortable. Of course, people of diverse genders and sexual orientations, we do a whole lot of other stuff than just having sex, but I think some of the discomfort comes from people reducing us and sexualizing us in that way. And in terms of the second part of your question, Kathy, where you asked why is it easier for some people? I think a lot of it has to do with exposure. I think that that which we are unfamiliar with tends to make us anxious or scare us. So I think those individuals who have met people of differing sexual orientations, gender identities, just the exposure alone helps reduce a lot of that anxiety. KATHY PURNELL: What is the defining moment or a personal story that you could briefly share with us today about today’s topic? CHRIS COTTEN: I would say that the first one is the idea of chosen family. So I think the idea of chosen family has come out of that LGBTQ+ community, almost certainly it applies to everyone. And this is the idea that for many of us who belong to these communities, the LGBTQ+ community, there has been difficulty or tension with our families of origin. KATHY PURNELL: Mmm. CHRIS COTTEN: And as a result of that, we form families of our own that are not blood families, but are just as strong and supportive as the concept of family as it’s generally used. So I would say that’s one thing. In terms of– I’ll just briefly mention two other, I guess, defining moments for me. One would be HIV/AIDS. I was born in 1959. I grew up in the ’60s and ’70s. And when HIV/AIDS emerged in our society, I think I was about 21 or 22 years old living in New York City. And it very much was something, I think, that was really a defining experience for a lot of members of our community, especially those who have both the loss that we endured, which was way different than you would expect for someone of that young age, and the idea of being a survivor of all of that. And then the last thing I’ll mention actually is the 1993 March on Washington. So I actually participated in that March on Washington. It was about a million LGBTQ+ Americans marching. It was when Bill Clinton was the president. It was right after he had sort of turned back on a promise to include LGBT– or at least lesbian, gay, bisexual people in the military. And that was an incredible, unforgettable experience for me that showed me the strength that can come in numbers when members of a community, especially a marginalized community come together. The power was palpable, and I will never, ever forget it. KIM KICK: I’d like to build on what Chris just talked about. I was also in 1993 at the March on Washington. And it was a very powerful experience, and there’s a few defining moments that come out of that, both positive and negative. I’ll start with the negative. The negative, I remember, it was hard to book a flight. So the AIDS epidemic was going on, and they were denying flights to Washington, DC to a lot of people that they somehow determined were gay, lesbian, bisexual, because of AIDS and because of the panic, that that had the fear that was– the fear mongering that took place during that period of time because, of course, it was a punishment for the gay community. Justly deserved in the eyes of many, especially many fringe factional religious communities. Really seized upon that as an opportunity to kind of wag fingers and say, see? We told you so. Then when we did get flights out and we were headed to Washington, DC. They removed all the pillows. So the little tiny pillows that you would get in the blankets. So they didn’t want anything. We were contaminated. So you really felt that. You felt like you were contaminated. You definitely felt like an other, an outsider, and somebody that was not wanted. And somebody that was judged just for their mere existence. And I think that’s an important point for students to remember. When they begin formulating opinions and attitudes, is the damage that can cause to people. Those are aggressions against people just for being who they are. The positives that came out of that were the sense of community, which was overwhelming, because prior to that, I grew up in a suburb of Chicago. So a defining moment was, I’d have to go to Chicago to find that family you create as Chris was talking about, and that’s where you would go. You would go to the city, because there just wasn’t a lot out at that point in the late ’70s, early ’80s, there wasn’t anything in terms of a support system or a community that we could tap into. So the closest was to go to Chicago, and I was fortunate to grow up in an area where that was a pretty easy ride for me. I can’t imagine the experience for others that lived in very rural areas where they couldn’t find that connection, because that would be a very, very lonely existence. And at that time, you were made to feel bad about yourself. There was no positive coming out and saying, I’m gay. That was not positive. That was a cause of consternation in families, of oh my God, what kind of life have you chosen for yourself? You know this will be very hard, and worse. So my family was more on the mild end of that, of, you’ll never have children, it’ll be a hard life, blah, blah, blah. And just thinking back to that march, there was a lot. The gay community had definitely felt slapped down by Clinton. So we were doing that. And then trying to get there, just to get there to get together and make our presence known was just such a horrible experience. But then landing there and getting there kind of– it was all worthwhile for sure. And during the march, I’ll never forget the Holocaust Museum was under construction and nearing completion. Do you remember that, Chris? CHRIS COTTEN: I don’t. KIM KICK: Right. So there were a lot of Nazi, neo-Nazi skinhead protests– CHRIS COTTEN: Well that I remember. KIM KICK: When we walked by, they were everywhere. And that was not unusual for us because Chicago Gay Pride Parade, they’d always be out in the truckloads with the Nazis screaming and spitting. But I’ll never forget, they were there. And it was kind of a nice double dip for them, they could kill two birds with one stone, so to speak, because they could be bashing the gay community while they were bashing the Jewish community because they were protesting in front of the museum that was about to open. And I remember just a large gathering, and the momentum kind of changed because we weren’t going to take it anymore. Normally you’d walk away from people like that. And the momentum changed and it was like we’re done with this. So there was a bit of back and forth, and then the police had to come in and break that up. But– CHRIS COTTEN: Yeah, they were vastly outnumbered, these protesters. KIM KICK: Vastly outnumbered. CHRIS COTTEN: Which was also an incredible feeling. I remember just shouting them down, basically. KIM KICK: Right, right. But we would be spit upon. It wasn’t– they would spit upon you. So it was a very violent, aggressive experience in some ways, but then a very beautiful harmonious experience in most ways. KATHY PURNELL: You’ve done an amazing job at just providing some of the historical pieces that perhaps students absolutely unaware of, even some of our faculty. Some of these experiences I was unaware of. But I like how you summed that up in the end. Although there’s that negative piece, there was some positive memories and experiences that really empowered both of you. What are some helpful strategies to encourage culturally responsive practices with the LGBTQ+ population? Yeah? What are some things that our students and even educators could do to ensure that we’re doing this right? KIM KICK: I think one of the things is to set aside biases and preconceived notions that you’re holding. So the first part is examining yourself. What do you think? What are your biases? What are your preconceived notions? Where did they come from? Did you formulate those beliefs on your own? Or were those beliefs that were instilled upon you by your community, by your family, by your religious institutions, whatever that may be? So I think that is the first part, is to recognize your preconceived notions, which are probably inaccurate, and your biases, and then examine where they came from. Really take a look and try to figure it out. CHRIS COTTEN: The National Association of Social Workers Code of Ethics is clear about our mandate to advocate for and support marginalized communities. And when you talk about gender-diverse individuals and people of diverse sexual orientations, they fit very squarely into that mandate. I think what I would say to people also is what I would say when talking about exposure to any new culture. We are living in a time of incredible access to information. So study. Get out there, read what’s out there. And maybe even more useful than that, I would say get out into the community. Make some friends who are different than yourself. To me, that experience of meeting someone that’s a member of a community that you’ve never been exposed to before is way more powerful than reading dozens of books or articles about that community. So LGBTQ+ people, we are everywhere now. So get out there, make friends with someone at work, go volunteer for your local LGBTQ+ organization. Get out there. It will reduce the anxiety, and I think it will also open up a wellspring of empathy for folks. KATHY PURNELL: Yes. Well, I love those ideas. Examining biases where they come from, evaluating. Do they even have– are they even are they even true? Doing some research and some immersion experiences. But sometimes this can be frightening for people who are stuck in their experience. So while these are really helpful, how can you help somebody get unstuck? Just to take that initial step? Because these are great, but how do you begin to push someone? KIM KICK: I think whether you’re talking about the LGBTQ community or if you’re talking about people from different ethnic backgrounds, or if you’re talking about people from different socioeconomic statuses, religions, it goes on and on, whatever. Ability, level of ability. Whatever it may be, you’re in the social work profession. There is a responsibility both for you personally and an ethical responsibility to, again, go back and examine those beliefs. And you’re responsible for figuring out how you can work with others that perhaps have not been in your bubble or in your community. That’s a responsibility you take on as a social worker. And if people aren’t willing to take that step and face maybe fears of different groups that they may have, whether it is LGBTQ or the African-American community, whatever that is, or people with different levels of ability, you’re responsible for going out and facing those fears, and educating yourself in some way as we try to educate you here. But there is a personal responsibility, I think. And if people don’t want to do that, this might not be the right field. I mean, honestly. We are out here to work with everyone. We’re not out here to say, oh, I’ll work with this community, but I don’t like this group and they shouldn’t even be in existence. That’s the wrong mental attitude to come to social work with. CHRIS COTTEN: I was going to build upon something that Kim said about reflecting a little bit on where these beliefs came from. Most of us that have negative beliefs about specific groups. This is– most of the time it has come from our families of origin. I guess I would ask people, is this serving you? How is this belief serving you right now and is it something that you– a lot– this applies to so many things about how all of us grew up. So ask yourself, is this serving me right now? How is it serving me? I can tell you that as a social worker, it’s not serving you. So I like Kim’s idea about people reflecting on where some of these beliefs came from and questioning themselves about whether this is something useful that works for them now, especially professionally, or whether it’s something they need to reconsider or even discard totally. KIM KICK: If I could just add something to that. So we know that people tend to surround themselves with that which they are comfortable. And so that includes what you read. So we tend to view programs or read things that reinforce our pre-existing beliefs about the others, whoever that other may be. So I would challenge people to, if they’re not comfortable, meeting somebody face-to-face and having a discussion to read something that goes against your frame of reference. So to get out there and read something that goes against that. KATHY PURNELL: As we come to a close, I want you both to think about what you would like students to consider or take away from this discussion. In other words, what would you want them to know and why? KIM KICK: I think the biggest thing that I want students to take away from any discussion on diversity is this notion of needing to hate or dislike another group just because they are in that group. And we really need to be focusing on the commonalities we all have, because there are much more things we have in common, whether you’re gay– identify as gay, bisexual, straight, queer, whatever. We have far more in common than is different. It’s not that crazy difference. And that goes the same, again, with all the other groups. Whether it is along racial lines or whatever. It is that we all share commonalities that far exceed the differences that we have. And I think that’s important to remember, that the point is to look for the touch points where we have things in common, and to really remember that this profession is about helping. It’s a helping professional. Chris used the word marginalized community, and I don’t want to be in a marginalized community. And I’m sure nobody wants to be a member of a marginalized community, because it feels crappy. It doesn’t feel good being a marginalized community. So to remember your words count, what you say, how you say it, words count. And are you– take a moment to reflect and think before you speak. But again, to remember, we are much more similar than different. CHRIS COTTEN: I actually had a flashback to that 1993 March on Washington as Kim was talking. One of the chants that I remember us chanting in the streets of DC was, we’re here, we’re queer, get used to it. So that may sound confrontational to people, but here’s what I would say. Agree or disagree, this is a community that already exists. The toothpaste is already out of the tube. You can say, I don’t believe that transgender is a real thing or I don’t believe in this, and it doesn’t matter whether you believe in it or not. These individuals are out there. You’re going to encounter them in your community. You’re going to encounter them in social work practice. And as a social worker, you have an obligation to help people not harm them. We never want to retraumatize a population that’s already coming in with trauma. So I really feel like a social workers, you have a choice before you to sort of reject this or accept this. And I guess the last thing that I think of is oftentimes what I encourage students to do who are having trouble feeling compassion or empathy for a particular population, is to reflect a little bit about their own intersectional experiences. So almost everybody out there has– is a member of a group that has been down or marginalized at one time or another. If you can tap into that experience and what that has felt like for you personally, I believe that that can really help open you up to have empathy for other groups. And just remember, that as long as one of us is down, we’re basically all down. KATHY PURNELL: And that is a perfect place for us to pause. And I hope that this conversation will continue in another realm, because it’s just the beginning. And these are the types of conversations as we know in our program that need to happen, where people can hear these experiences. So let’s keep the conversation going. Thank you for being here today. [MUSIC PLAYING]